Follow the link to read the rest...The Onion | Nation's Poor Win Election For Nation's Rich
WASHINGTON, DC—The economically disadvantaged segment of the U.S. population provided the decisive factor in another presidential election last Tuesday, handing control of the government to the rich and powerful once again.
"The Republican party—the party of industrial mega-capitalists, corporate financiers, power brokers, and the moneyed elite—would like to thank the undereducated rural poor, the struggling blue-collar workers in Middle America, and the God-fearing underpriviledged minorities who voted George W. Bush back into office," Karl Rove, senior advisor to Bush, told reporters at a press conference Monday. "You have selflessly sacrificed your well-being and voted against your own economic interest. For this, we humbly thank you."
Added Rove: "You have acted beyond the call of duty—or, for that matter, good sense."
According to Rove, the Republicans found strong support in non-urban areas populated by the
people who would have benefited most from the lower-income tax cuts and social-service
programs championed by Kerry. Regardless of their own interests, these citizens turned out in
record numbers to elect conservatives into office at all levels of the government.
[...]
*Goethe: A Faustian Life*
5 hours ago
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